no room for grey
I don’t like the colour grey. clouds are fine, but if they take over too much space they limit the sky. grey limits me, I feel, I want light or no light, yes or no, alpha or omega – other colours and their shades are fine too, but shades of grey? come on that’s lame . . .
a while ago I found one of my posts commented saying everything for me ‘is either black or white’ and that I should ‘discover a different tone than that of the preacher’. the criticism inspired me to wipe the glass of the shades I see the world through – here it goes:
first of all I do believe, that the majority of people on earth (including me) are highly affected in their everyday normal life by preachers around us. I’m talking about preachers from Santa Clause to the Sesame Street Gang to Jesus Christ and the living representatives of the (Catholic) Christian Church, including the pope.
those preachers – whether on advertisement or in a temple – are conditioning us and ruling our lives from the moment we start breathing. over the years I started realising more and more how heavy the influence from all sides can weigh on a characters development of the young human being. shaping the individual, to uniform it into a functional little piece of the society, is what the state, the school, the family and friends, the TV and the temples do whenever they get a hold of you.
the tools therefore are numerous and hard to avoid. in some countries and living rooms the TV becomes a god-like, personified institution for a perfect start in the day with the weather channel and motherfuckers, before the kids leave to obey well laid education programmes, tortured by teachers and other bully friends – there’s little room for individualism, the others are sorted out to give room for the cookie cut kids, who’re meeting the well laid quality standards. but the quantity fails the system and achievements of a higher learning is truly reached then by the others later in life (it’s not unusual that the nerd from the past lives an exciting life in the presence). but first they get crappy lunch and soft-drinks served, while the label on the packaging talks zero trans-fat, promising a better and healthier life with rotten teeth.
the terror of nightmarish imaginations of an existing hell founded in the 1st testament of the bible might have haunted some, but we’re living a life of sinners for beginners, so we find our way around. we simply construct our reality in a way where right and wrong always finds the right context and the entire shoe collection fits into the shoe shelf. we are so self-righteous, but not very self aware.
I was asked to ‘relax. Lighten up. Breathe.’ I don’t want to breathe any more since my mind mirrored all the grief, the suffer and unfairness in this world. all the unfairness in my eyes simply based on disproportionate and excessive distribution of goods (in a wider sense: including shelter, food, basic needs, etc.) and the global conflicts over resources, power and beliefs. there’s assholes in every country, sex, race, job, occupation, passion, grocery store.
it sounds vague and quite general and yes, my mind sometimes turns around a lake of negative thoughts far away, but I want to accept that source of the tragedy, the theatre play of the world lays in all of us, in our lifestyles, our kitchens, our back- and front yards.
let’s say wo(men) invent something people are craving for, but the production can just be established if forests have to be logged down. then it has to happen, under any circumstances and questionable conditions. the ‘black and white’, ‘Yes or No’, ‘doing it or not doing it’ in our world with leaving ‘room for grey’ means to come up with fake clubs with fake goals like the ‘Roundtable on whatever’ to cover up, that the a decision for ‘black’ or ‘white’ has already been made.
of course there is a lot of great things out there and good people exist and good people do good things, but on a world wide scale we only sacrifce to a certain point, we’re not selfless at all, but we like to believe we are. living a life under the shades of grey means to me giving up, hiding under the rock of a regular life, finding easy answers for easy questions, willing to accept dogmas we can’t or we don’t want to change, because if we would we might question and shake the tree of paradigms that symbolise the state, the authorities and their ideologies – and who does that? that’d be inconvenient.View other posts by Muli Muli