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a nipster a yupster and a unicorn go to a bar…

January 24, 2015 - mirrormirror -

it’s just a joke and some hip thoughts . . .

there’s all these different terms and expressions to attack a person with: we call people hipster, we call them yuppies and we call others bitch and motherfucker. terms for people, who move from one place to another and live the way they choose to spend their lifes on. a while go some thoughts about us came gushing out my mind with limited results.
well, to each their own and so on, but something is bothering me: people! people, who harass others with their lifestyle(s) and take over territories in which they’re gathering what they think is gold, store it in their fortresses and come out prancing eventually to unnerve the others – they make me uncertain about my own existence – who am I, how do I dress, how do people see me, how do I want them to see me, am I attractive, do I care, do you care, who cares?

let’s talk about the drive and let’s begin with the ‘yuppie’ age before beauty: driven by

  • a pretty clear ideal of success
    (the better the job the better – or more organic – the honey)
  • status
    (symbols) like car, apt., other goods of luxury)
  • power
    a la ‘you can’t sit with us’ – separation anxieties, but the other way, they want to separate ((themselves from those who’re not (yet) allowed to play with them))

the yuppie unfortunately is already half way through his life, so there’s no sense in talking to much about their faith, but it puts them into a position where the good old mid-life crisis can play a big role in the game of life. the yuppie is searching what, in their eyes, appears to be “important” to achieve a certain level on the ‘good-life-ranking’ – they can waste their whole lives seeking for something they loose right away once they got it, you can’t buy satisfaction, balance or happiness! if you’re not cool, you’re just not cool.

that’s where the ‘hipster’ role becomes important: driven by

a pretty face!
male: a big big beard, or if you can’t grow a beard take the moustache! tight jeans, tie? no? maybe bow tie? lumberjack shirt, an army of shiny accessories – you look like a upper class bum, someone who’s got the permission to ask for change in their parents suburban neighbourhood.
female: the dress! one of these bloody jeans in which every woman has a big butt… but this might be a silent act of solidarity with woman, who have bigger butts than you – an unconscious fear of getting older or so. just don´t wast your time on the hip neighbourhood cat walks, go running instead. it clears your mind, keeps you healthy, even I do that.. but I don´t wear tight jeans, so who am I to judge you.
unisex: I want to fuck the DJ, I am a DJ, everyone’s a DJ, fuck me I’m the DJ.
hipster-bag, sunglasses, analogue SLR cam (until they realize, that a film has to be processed and that costs money and when they see the result, they might resign, because it takes time to gain experience with a cam, shooting is art and needs patience, the SLR disappears in the closet – again.

fashion above all!
you kill on the flea market if necessary or you go on a rampage in the thrift store to bitch you up. rich hipster kids are excluded, they go to boutiques where they find vintage imitations for outrageous prices. these boutiques are run by former real hipsters, who go out to find motives, like the very popular Iron Maiden- or Pink Floyd artworks to print them onto shirts. it’s disgusting, but not as evil as some dirty steam punk bitch, who opens up a place, where she sells stuff from the thrift store or from the garbage and tags a nice price on it – it’s basically still a thrift store or a flea market, but just for better people in better situations. the hipster wants to be individual for the pursuit of authenticity they’re lacking so much. but – again – you can’t buy that.

the problem of the hipster trend is that the whole show is so ephemeral. once something is said to be cool, hip, in, hot it’s not any more, it needs to be replaced in the very moment it becomes hipster, because then it’s no more hipster.

Cummings said try to “be nobody-but-yourself – in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else…”

I say: very true! but how do you wanna be yourself, if the world around you is packed with people, who look like you? one runs around with the same appearance and your face seems to be seen a thousand time, when you run around down town realising that now everybody is cutting their hair on their own – like you!

wouldn’t it be hilarious to put a bunch of yuppies and hipsters into an arena to let them find out who’s winning by having a last-man-standing event. I think it would!

until that, they ((hipster, yuppies, nipster (nazi-hipster)) resurrect, as locusts, this time coming to your town!

and – again – nobody cares about the unicorns…

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  1. patrick says:

    you promised a joke…

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