let’s end the cold winter
I worked on a ‘hate-post’ about the cold winter when the first warm sun rays of the year hit my face and my mind: face the winter, turn it around . . .
mother hulda: we the people are collateral damage in the perpetual war of zillions of fluffy flakes and the municipality. salt turns snow into slash and the colour grey overcomes all approaches to live a winter of happiness – the situation seems to be inescapable, but is it really?
snowy public playgrounds: go sledging before it melts, start a snowball fight, or just wander over a snowy micro-mountain-range next door and cause a tiny avalanche – if nothing helps build an igloo and find shelter.
be the first and get a sunburn, it’s easy, just stop wherever you are and turn your nose into the big, red fireball, wait, relax, grill.
grill! get your barbecue out of the garage, invite a bunch of friends, beer and confetti if you like and have a outdoors party – you don’t need a reason to celebrate.
slow down! go for a walk and hit every street light buzzer you pass, even if you don’t have to cross – your contribution to a city with less noise- and asshole-pollution.
the dog park: DO NOT get yourself a dog! yes, they are cute and often times very cuddly, but they are work – a lot of work! imagine you would sit all day in the same, small apartment. you would refuse to pee or poop too, if the only spot is the shitty backyard behind your house.
the doggy factor: DO get yourself a dog! yes, they are cute and often times very cuddly, and they are THE ice breaker of mammal history. they help you if you’re alone and still suffering from winter depression and they get you a friend or two for sure, because they don’t care, they usually don’t care about social expectation – they don’t give a shit. and when they do, they still don’t give a shit, got it?
wardrobe: get rid of your layers, layer down! go out without a coat, try man-tights with wife beater and fight for women and against fashion-nazis. get harder, strengthen your self confidence – you can do it!
snow-nazis: the ol’ lady (mother hulda) who brings the snow is white. like God, Santa Clause and the Valentines-Man and the Snowman – that’s racism! why is snow not black and turns white through over-pollution? that would make the destruction of our planet look way nicer and like a wedding.
what a weird weird world.
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